Sunday, 7 November 2010

Discerning Widsom From Insanity

I am so excited! Today, I have the honour of publishing my first ever guest post, written by an exquisitely beautiful, gifted woman. Anne-Marie Marron is someone who, when you're in her presence, visibly resonates the most incredible energy of love, acceptance and wisdom. 

I met Anne-Marie in Spring 2009 at the gorgeous Esalen Institute in Big Sur, California. Although we didn't get much time together, I knew in my gut and in my heart that meeting her was significant. She departed one Sunday afternoon, and it wasn't until many months later that we became reacquainted through Facebook. 

Then, one day a few months ago, I saw a post from Anne-Marie offering complimentary coaching in September. Her business name, "Revealing Widsom" has the strapline, "Allowing your life to be your teacher", and my wise one said, "Yes! Yes!"

What I received from meeting with Anne-Marie in that first session was almost indescribably beautiful - a vision of my life, a year in the future, which was so full of Elloaness that I was surprised I'd never encountered it before. I didn't even have to make the decision to enter officially into coaching with her; the decision just arose from within me. Working with Anne-Marie is one of the highlights of my week. The space she holds is full of everything I need: a completely nourishing sense of safety; unlimited, unrestricted permission to explore and express; a space which just naturally generates insight, a deep sense of being known, and playful connection galore.

It is my humble opinion that this woman has an incredible gift, which she is so willing to extend and share. Please take a few moments to visit her lovely website, and don't just take my word for it!

Finally, I would like to thank the ingenious people who created Skype, allowing us to meet face to face each week even though we live thousands of miles apart.

And now... drumroll please... It's Anne-Marie!

Discerning Wisdom from Insanity

“Just Rest…You Will Know When You Need to Know”

I recently participated in a Hakomi weekend; a somatic based mindfulness-training.
The message I received in the stillness and quieting of my mind was, “Just rest.  You will know when you need to know”.
As my mind spun through the various scenarios in my life that ‘need’ tending or ‘fixing’, this voice stopped me in my tracks.  What is most true is that any effort for me ‘to know‘ only prolongs my capacity to feel the gifts in my life right now.
In that moment, I dropped any agenda and felt the resting in my mind and body.
There are two gems from this experience that I want to share:
Stop and Rest:
This doesn’t mean crawl back into bed and take a respite from the world, although it sometimes can mean this.
To rest is to no longer feel flung around by the mind and its many distractions, stories and tugs that keep us actively solving and analyzing.
It takes great discipline to recognize the automatic response of the mind to interpret and commentate about our experiences rather than simply abide in our immediate experience.
When we cultivate enough awareness to investigate and witness the default patterns of the mind, we can begin to make new choices and rewire the neural pathways in the brain that impact our emotions and physical vitality.
How do you stop when the mind is spinning and guiding you down a well worn track that feels comfortably twisted and simultaneously limiting?
Do you notice the subtle default responses to work harder, achieve, understand or resolve?

Stay With the Longing:
I love to learn, explore and connect with people on a deep level.   I often find that my heart physically hurts as it longs for a particular kind of connection, community or experience.
Longing is a perfectly normal human condition.   When I can stop here, I don’t experience any distress.  When I don’t stop with the longing and I attempt to package and identify a form for these longings to take shape into, I struggle.
In my efforts to ‘fulfill’ this inspiration, I forget that the intelligence born from the longing will offer the opportunity or insight in its own timing.  I’m not suggesting we sit back, kick up our feet and zone out.
The invitation is to stay with the longing and to allow life to inform us through its mysterious and unpredictable ways.
There is an innate skill we have to attract experiences and information to guide us.   It requires quieting down, listening and receiving information from all sources that inform us.  
How do we listen to the messages from the subtle cues of our body, mind & life experiences?
For example, a chance meeting with someone we needed to meet or learn something from or a random Google search that introduces us to something that mobilizes a particular movement toward our longing.
When I bring this unconscious information into my awareness I experience an exquisite kind of freedom.


Brooke said...

I love the title of this post!

Wow, Elloa, thank you for introducing us to this amazing woman, and her insight. What a beautiful way to have met her and then begin to work with her on your journey. I love all these surprises around the corner. Her words resonate so much with me. I love the idea of staying with the longing and then letting the wisdom and experiences come to support this longing.

I also want to address your last comment on my blog. I so respect your outright honesty, facing stories in yourself and in others that would keep you separate--to bring them out in the open and lift the 'veil of fear'. You are very inspiring. Isn't it funny the fears we can have even being as far away as we are.

You are showing me amazing possibilities in life by sharing so courageously who you are and the path you are following--including your fears-and how you are choosing love so consistently.

It is funny, because, in so many ways, you remind me of Julia, and I see parts of myself in Nige, which is such a beautiful thing, as there is such an easy and instant feeling of connection in seeing yourself in another.

I feel so honored that you resonate with my words. Thank you for expressing it so beautifully and graciously. As for your bulldog, I am glad that he was able to both protect you and get through to you. I am glad that you realized that you never needed protection, except from your thoughts.

As for relationships, after getting divorced, I feel I have opened up to the idea that relationships are used for learning, and may not be needed forever, but that while they are there we can experience ourselves with the dynamics that our relationships bring in the moment, futher setting us free, and opening us to love, love, love!


Anne-Marie said...

I'm so honored to be a guest on your lovely blog! Your presence is such a gift in my life, Elloa.

Julia said...

Oh goodness. Where do I begin? Wow, did this post resonate, as does everything about you, Elloa, and Brooke's comment too. You do remind me of me, Elloa--I'll take Brooke's observation as a compliment. :)

What a beautiful story of meeting know, just very recently (could it have been the spring of 2009?)ago I was in Big Sur and passed by Esalen and something about it made me stop and wonder. Hmmm. It's amazing how, when we pay attention, we know right away when a person is going to be significant in our lives. So glad the two of you reconnected.

Anne-Marie, thank you so much for being Elloa's guest today...everything that you said here confirms the messages that I've been receiving lately. I'm so getting that peace comes when we let go of the oars and let ourselves be carried...and, oh, what a relief it is to let go.

Sending love to both of you beautiful women.

Julia said...

Sitting here on a Tuesday evening, realizing that I'm missing you.

I hope you are loving whatever IS.

Sending you my love.