Endless gazing deep into his beautiful, wolfish eyes. I could be with you for eternity.
A heart pounding, rhythmic, energizing run around our new village. My new trainers were so worth the £90 I paid for them.
No more surround sound underneath my bedroom, invading my moments of quiet with gunshots and MTV. Instead, the hum of the fridge - our hum, our fridge - and the coo of birds on the roof.
Space. Quiet. Home. Long overdue, yet here, right now - and I'm here, right now, soaking it deep into my being, allowing myself the awareness that I totally deserved to allow this to happen.
Being true to myself and honouring that I needed this, this day of stillness, this day of solitude. Lovingly cancelling my plans, and turning my eyes towards the dawning awareness that perhaps I need this day to be empty every single week at the moment.
Honesty of the brutal kind, through which gushes a torrent of emotion, deeply held beliefs, and - yes! - me emerging again, bruised but not broken, innocent, vulnerable and tender. Witnessed. Supported. Seen. Safe. Loved.
Utter heart wrench as I watch the devastation wrought on Japan. A decision to donate, to contribute, to be open to my part.
Your Voice, for never leaving me, for never forsaking me. Please be with them too.
Incredible friends who write and create with such beauty that it changes my life.
For all this, I am indescribably grateful.
It's good to be back. What gratitude are you nurturing today?
2 comments:
Dear Elloa,
This is such a beautiful, beautiful post. I feel myself exhaling and stopping it all, and joining you here in the sensations of this new life that you so deserve, in the forever realization that you are not alone, and in the savoring of the small things that add up to bring such sweet joy--but would be missed by anyone without the trust, recognition of love, and the sinking down into the truth of the moment. You are beauty. Welcome back!
Precious Elloa...I'm so very glad you're back.
Your words soothe & overflow with love. You so deserve every little bit of goodness that you describe here. I am so very happy for you & Nige...together, in love, in your new home.
Ahhhhh...deep exhales.
I hope you can feel the love...I so adore you, my friend.
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